Apparently I don't remember sh*t from Grade 8 sewing class... my thread keeps breaking, the stitches at the back are completely different than the front ones, I use the foot pedal like I'm driving a car on the highway, I'm a sewing mess!
I experimented with a few pieces of fabric that I was willing to sacrifice, but quickly moved to on to sewing with paper, which oddly seemed less precious and less serious. I just relaxed a little more with the paper.
Because I am crazy and impatient and need to make something immediately, I started a garland....at least the beginnings of one. I realize I am very far from making that apron I was talking about. At this point, I can sew about 4 triangles (that's my record) and then my thread breaks. I've got some ways to go, obviously. Luckily this wonky garland (once I finish it) will go very nicely with my unintentional amoeba-shaped glass ornaments. Ahh.... there's nothing like experimental holiday decorations.
I've decided I need to take a beginners class. This whole idea of remembering how to sew from 18 odd years ago and "teaching" myself isn't going to work....